Fake News

I’ll give you my impression, unabashed, forsooth

I’ll give you my opinion, a substitute for truth

You’ll be hearing many different versions

So sort out what you can

The epistles that we’re preaching

Are invented for our fans

 

In science we are skeptical

They think we are receptacles

For drivel from so called experts

Who are shills for bureaucrats

They are paid to say those things, you know

They are low down dirty rats

 

Climate change, a hoax you see

Perpetuated by the red Chinese

They say that carbon is arising

We say that’s not so surprising

How can they be in the know

When this year brought us April snow?

 

CO2 it is a blast

Plants love it, eat it fast

So how can that be bad, we say with grin

When plants turn carbon into oxygen?

So bring on the carbon, burn that coal

Save those jobs, let it roll

 

So now don’t you think it’s time

We start cracking down on crime?

Build a wall, stop the immigrants

From bringing drugs, gangs and rape

From their depredations we must escape

And keep America white and great

 

And to those who don’t believe our views

We know you, victims of fake news

That liberal Eastern institution

Promoting the canard of Russian collusion

Are dupes trying to stir up drama

Who really miss Barack Obama

 

So to those who have proclivity

To believe in pure objectivity

We have news, we hope to shout

Louder to create great doubt

We spread the word to our minions

We hate facts that contradict our opinions