CARS, INSURANCE, WINDOWS & PILLS
When I watch television, I am struck by the commonplace and repetitive nature of the commercials. To wit:
CARS: There are the latest models whizzing down uncrowded two-lane highways, or even dirt road back country lanes implying that you can go anywhere you want without getting stuck. One commercial even shows a vehicle doing donuts in the dirt. Who does that? Nobody I know. So, hop on down to your local dealer and take advantage of mega dollars off and low interest rates to put you behind the wheel of the latest iteration of a SUV or a pickup. Just don’t ask to take a test drive to the country to cross streams or to do donuts in the dirt.
INSURANCE: Did you know that life is full of risk? Don’t worry, you can buy insurance to mitigate most any risk. Are you concerned that your used car might break down costing you an arm and a leg to repair? No problem, you can buy insurance to cover that—after all, it’s not a matter of if, but when. Speaking of car insurance, major companies are vying for your business, touting low rates and one even promising to customize so you only pay for what you need. Question: how do you know what you need? You can even buy so-called life insurance, which is another way of saying that your heirs can collect when you drop dead.
WINDOWS: Did you know you need new windows? I bet you are wondering what’s wrong with the ones you have. The window guy tells you yours are drafty and outdated. So, for a low monthly price you can have them come out and replace your old drafty and outdated windows with new ones. All done by professional installers.
PILLS: I didn’t realize there were so many maladies in this world that I’ve never heard of. Don’t worry, we’ve got a pill for that. From arthritis to psoriasis, from constipation to poor cognition, from allergies to bipolar disorder, there are pills you can ask your doctor about, but don’t take them if you are allergic to them. Big Pharma stockholders are cashing in.
Of course, the above doesn’t cover all the commercial categories, but if you throw in hot tub replacement ads and commercials by lawyers who want to represent you if you’ve been injured or if you have mesothelioma it comes close. But companies wouldn’t spend so much on ads if they weren’t effective—right?
Bad Randall 